“Break the habit of being yourself….” That is a Joe Dispenza-ism… He wrote a book by a similar title – Breaking the habit of being yourself. I will add it to my growing list of ‘To Read’ books. Since my stack is already about half a meter, and falling over – I must refrain for a little while.
Is being yourself a habit? That needs to be broken? Perhaps.
I am inclined to think we need to break the habit of being who we think other people want us to be.
Be genuinely yourself. Now there is a scary thought huh? There is all sorts of literature that eludes to this sentiment from early day philosophers (James), impossible reads (Nietzsche), children books (Dr. Seuss) and hundreds of others in between. The elusive quest to be ourselves is not new.
- “Be yourself, everyone else is taken.” – Mike Robbins
- “Know Thyself” – William James
- “Live a life that is yours. Do not seek the approval of others. When you meet with friction or judgement, it’s a sign you are on your own path.” – Brendon Burchard
- “Your time is limited, don’t waste it living someone else’s life.” – Steve Jobs
- “Become who you already are.” – Nietzche
- “Be who you are and say what you mean, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” – Dr. Seuss
I love Brooke Castillo’s approach to this. “I am a peach. Some people don’t like peaches. It’s not the peaches fault.” So freeing right? Reality is people are going to think their own thoughts and there is precious little you can do about it. We have no control over what someone else is thinking, so there is no point in worrying about it.
We do however, have complete control over our own thoughts. We can choose our thoughts.
You can choose how you want to show up in your own life. You can choose to be a magnificent peach. That will not change the fact that there will always be people that don’t like peaches. It won’t matter if you are sweeter or less fuzzy. Don’t pretend to be a nectarine or a plum. You are a peach, magnificent or not, they don’t like peaches. For all you know they don’t like nectarines or plums either. When we show up as some non-peach version of ourselves, no one wins. You don’t get to be you, and they don’t get to know you…. The genuine peachy you!
What will people think? Such a dream killer question. We are terrified ‘the-big-they’ will judge us. Well, news flash – they already are or they don’t care!
- You worry ‘they’ will criticize you because you show up in running shoes and comfy yoga pants.
- You worry ‘they’ think you are too heavy.
- You worry about ordering your favourite dish.
- You worry about seeming extravagant if you buy a lovely Italian leather jacket.
Our thoughts about ‘other people’s opinion about us’ are optional.
What if, it is okay for non-peach lovers to live their own life and have their own preferences? Let it have nothing to do with you.
What if you decide to show up in your own life as the true peach you are? Decide your own opinion is the most important opinion. It is okay to show up in running shoes and yoga pants with your extravagant Italian leather jacket.
Other people’s opinions, are their concern not yours.
Which brings us back to Dr. Suess…
“Be who you are and say what you mean, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”
Be the magnificent peach that you are!
Buff it up,
my friends
Dr. Karen
Are you ready to Buff Up Your Brain? Ready to, lose weight and the brain fog? Upgrade your thoughts. Let’s chat.
Email: DrKaren@karenbackwaymd.com
